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PEACE COMES WHEN WE STOP WATCHING THE CLOCK AND CONTROL THE PASSAGE OF TIME

Peace comes, a wise man once intoned, when we disregard the passage of time. We control tension by controlling our thoughts.

Those are two major ways we relieve stress -- which so many of us suffer. It comes down to balance: We feel stress when we are doing too much or when we are doing too little. There has to be a balance between them.

Pressure comes when we press ourselves too much.

Now, everyone has to be conscious of the clock -- to an extent. You can't ignore an appointment. You have to show up for work. We live in a society that is ruled by it. We can't simply throw away the concept of time.

But we gain peace when it is not our central focus -- when we stop parceling out our lives according to the minutes, when we stop pressuring ourselves into an hourglass. Pressure indeed!

How to handle such?

Let a moment pass that you normally would not. Stop to do that little thing you usually ignore until later (because you are too "busy"). Make a habit of this. Take an extra minute each day, each hour, to converse with someone, or appreciate what's around you. You know the old cliché: smell the roses.

We're at a period in history when we have to change our rhythm. It was William James who said that the greatest weapon against stress "is our ability to choose one thought over another," and think about it: most of our tension comes when we let thoughts pile up -- thoughts of what we need to do, thoughts of problems, thoughts about what others think of us.

It comes down to spiritual discipline and such is also emphasized in a little booklet we carry called Managing Stress with the Help of Your Catholic Faith. As it points out, tension leads to headaches, upset stomach, sleep disturbances, lethargy, fatigue, hives or skin rashes, ringing in the ears, and feeling faint or dizzy.

It also increases our temptation to sin, causes resentment, leads to spiritual aridity, and lessens our desire to pray, causing a vicious cycle.

In the long haul, it hastens death -- and this is why we have to immediately tackle it.

Stress triggers adrenaline which eats away at the body like acid.

"Experts agree that one of the best ways to manage stress is to learn to let go," points out author Mary Lou Rosien.

Let go and let God. Slow down. Make time slow down. Ask the Blessed Mother to decelerate your life. You'll live longer or at least feel as if you did!

In these hectic times, we can perhaps go by the "one-quarter" rule:

If you are stressed because you're burning the candle at both ends, organize your day by removing a quarter of what you planned to do; simply snip out certain tasks that take you to (or over) the brink. When you're thinking of what you need to do in the course of a day, and suddenly the items begin to cause tension, it is because you are biting off too much.

Learn to say no. Don 't overextend yourself. If God didn't want us to rest, He would not have set aside the Sabbath.

Do you get all stressed out? Are you overextended? Do you feel pressure?

It doesn't make you less holy. Saints too suffered. St. Teresa of Ávila and St. John of the Cross faced immense pressure as they implemented reform of the Carmelites. St. Thérèse of Lisieux held the tense position of novice director. St. Francis endured the criticism of his followers.

All of us have tensions!

It is how we manage them. The saints learned how to regain their peace by looking at negative matters in a positive fashion.

When we don't control our thoughts -- when we hover over an issue, when we let things pile up, when we're in a negative mode -- we magnify tension.

Give it to God. Put it in a "box" for Him. And if it's someone causing you stress, recall the Littler Flower -- who, stressed over a fellow sister who prayed loudly and rattled rosary beads in the chapel, asked God to love the nun through her, despite her own irritation. That defused the situation.

"The ancient fathers," said St. Dorotheus, "preserved themselves in profound peace, for they received everything as coming from the Hand of God." They understood, as St. Alphonsus Liquori pointed out,  what St. Thomas declared centuries later: "True peace consists in not separating ourselves from the Will of God."

This is from another little booklet called Conformity to the Will of God.

When you feel tense, try your best to love and pray (it is proven to reduce stress chemicals in the brain). As the saying goes, don't lose sleep worrying; give your troubles to God; He's up all night anyhow.

Focus on sacred objects.

Read the Bible. What peace is in that!

Take prayer walks. Go on a retreat. Let go of unrealistic expectations. Detach from material objects. Forgive. Engage not with antagonists. Reframe the way you think of negative situations (making them challenges instead). Love in all circumstances.

And it's summer.

Take a real vacation.

Even if you don't leave your home, it's "time" to give it a rest.

[resources: Managing Stress with the Help of Your Catholic Faith and Conformity to the Will of God]

[see too: Prophecy, spiritual development, afterlife: retreat, Ohio, September 20]

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